Hey pay attn I'm trying to tell you something
listen you can be any thing you want to be
who cares what the world has to say
be yourself your all that you've got
close your eyes and they all go away
and for a moment you will see more clearly than ever
that the treasure of being free belongs to you
and the key is in yourself alone


"relec" when does everything become clear
"it doesn't"

why are details so hard to see

how naively we go through life
should we go with eyes on the ground
pretending that the passer by does not exist
feeling the need to look away
when our soul says stare
this avoiding eye contact must go


make them feel that another is happy and in their fear of standing out all will be smiling
as if nothing had happened at all

I think the facade of tolerance is humorous
its not a tolerance for all but a tolerance for a personal thought with utter disreguard for anothers
its the sick ness that screams you don't know what you are talking about you are so intolerant
tolerance is ridiculous
no one is tolerant of everything
we are tolerant of the things we choose to be
yet still we try to make each feel bad for their beliefs
for the choices they have made
at least if they disagree with ours

an expression of opinion without another asking

defending their atheism as ferociously as any religion
preaching tolerancebut intolerant of a different view which they claim is intolerant

back inside my shell
to spare myself this foolishness
to hold on to pride


what makes a hero

the world had been searching for a hero for many years

be an objectivist see your goal then live your life for the completion of it Ð
see it through to fruition.Ê
I will become through acting the role the hero I have chosen to be
Not a charade
Just life lived correctly

I have god and I have an innocent lover
my muse and my judge
my excuse
but
god nor an innocent lover is an excuse
you need
no excuse
just do what you do

Êwe live for the purpose placed on our plate
to do it the best we can
my purpose has been music for as long as i remember
through struggles against those who would change my mind
i have had to learn to forgive those who just didnÕt understand
they
could not defeat the drive within
could not turn me away
my dreams have grown
they encompass all that i am
and i want no more in life than to live and make my dreams come true
i do not want mine to be empty words but instead a mission statement declaring

that i will live my life to achieve my destiny

which is to change the world through music and art rolled into one
to present

that life is more than all of us
life is the ever present the unchanging
the ride that is unique but completely unchanging
Ê
i am not so important
what i have to say is
Ê
which is

i will leave for the world somthing special because it has known me
a connection with every human being on the face of the planet to bring them all together
tear them away from the darkness invading the world
feel needed and loved
give reason to love
to be loved
to be wanted and sought after

my selfish desire to rise is what holds me back to be recognized is to be seperate
the seeking of popularity is a flaw
Ê
this is where the story begins this moment this leaving this walking away
from one world into a new life

A story we tell as true as our lives
representing all
narrowing to two
The eternal battle between Good and evil juxtaposedÊor just apposed
The artist shows in a new light you
caught somewhere between the two
Ê
In the act words become your own
Aiming in the same direction as the book
Which screams at you make the choice

above all i wish to turn my life into my dream to live the story I am writing to be the person I choose to be ÊÊ
when I have won my battle I will come for you and take you away
Find your voice
Each has his own reason to walk away but the root is the same
Reach for life and grab it
Do not ask that it be put into your hands
Did you give back all that you gave
There must be a trial and an impassioned speech Ê

A procession of chantors in a dream sequence
Ê
The computer is like a servant
Don't push it to hard
Play to its abilities
Or it will be like a struggling waiter at lunch rush
Driving movement = being swallowed by the night

ÊWhat purpose do you serve
Servinge a world that won't serve itself
With draw and remove the legs from their monument of glory attributed to themselves
Ê
time lapse photography of the sky in your collage of art
Ê
Your whims cannot reach higher than your actions will take you
Ê
the lessons learned to day are the ones you will understand tommorrow

run out of the room and you grow
3d grid in side a room each point can be broken only once
Ê audience is in the third dimmension distant uninportant to moments we are in
they just confuse you look away
i have a mission and a purpose a thing to seperate me from the party that has captured the world
follow the goal and break from the party

i can only show you
I cannot explain
except in frames
each shot is the moment
the future is script and the past is film

Folk gives away to progressive
I will be there when the CD dies and gives birth to the DVD era
Ê
My eternal goal is to change the world to fight evil and leave the world a better place than I found it
How?

I wrote the story as a child
Only an adult could make it real

How can I rise from ledge to ledge
To find and become my hero inside
my gillotine's so slow to see
cutting like a knife
through the meat of me
like an ameoba
where once one cell was
there are now two

my parents going through the long drawn out process of childbirth
sending child out into the world to carve his own path
shifting ownership of my life from their hands to mine
I have been one of them for so long
One of the parasites
I feel like shit to ask them for the money
To see my goal through
To get the loan
Through them
I will pay it back but how
My parents have given far to much
It has come to a moment in time where I must grow my own wings
And earn my own way
Ê

I feel like my life is a charade
Like I fake my way through
Like I cannot be that hero I desire to be
So who do I want to be
So its like our lives
Its like soundtrack
Leaving behind the child inside
To grow up, evolve, let go of childish ways
So why haven't I

its just a scribble just a rough sketch
of the big picture
You can always go back later
and fill in the details
divide by two winning sides

Relec on the search for a new job
I can do this job, but what stimulus will have?
What opportunity for advancement?
How can I add? How can I improve upon the whole and how will I be rewarded for it?

I came out to California to get, to work, to create something, to get a life started, establish a business Ê
Allow yourself to determine what it is you want most in life
Ê
I know what I am by knowing what I am not

ÊMy more sensible principles
Become incomprehensible
When IÉ

The artist's creed
I spent so many nights under a moon lit sky
Trying so hard to find
a song to show
The essence of a soul
Cause in the end its all our breed has ever known
From the womb into the grave
we try our best to save
every token and momento
every feeling thatÕs ever been spoken
every heart thats ever been broken
And we pass it on to you
though itÕs the food that we live on
all this truth for the price of a life spent inside
searching for the deepest darkness
and the brightest light
for all time
for a chance to pass it on
just to have our art belong
in a world thatÕs so far gone
and doesn't care at all
maybe we could change it
rearange the mess once made
and make this world a better place

talking in circles gets no one anywhere

would they have us return to the jungle as apes
leaving behind our technology
pretending that our knowledge does not set us apart from the apes
are we parasites of the globe consuming but never giving back
Ê the skeleton of a holy book remains but the meat has been chopped away The deeper philosophies stretch their tentacles into all aspects of life First we run our fingers along the surface of knowledge Ê The book in my tale
Must equal all of those I read now
it seems empty but fills itself in as needed

some people you seek somthing to say with themÊ
they are the open minds
When there is nothing to say I won't
Time I will no longer fill with silence
I will no longer waste or misplace the time allotted to me


you find yourself in the party its the sunburst you see that you donÕt fit with these people
you see that
then you find the book in the library and the journey begins
all I have written in sound track happens at the party but the party seems to be life up till now
that first love that breaks your heart
the messing around that starts not a spark
the beauty of newness and teaching a soul
she was an outsider of the party brought her in just in time to see her left behind in it
coaxing her to come through it
now I go
but IÕm leaving her there
thats the end of the beggining


the biggest mistake is thinking you are more than you are
realize you limitations
and don't be cocky
plan for a second job
and network

in an imaginary world I struggle against thoughts
I have not yet had
yet I know that they will pass through my daydreams
as my mind drifts in and out of reality

no time to reflect

it could be as simple as a switch
a softness grows as the tear widens across the sky to the north and south
you make the world at your fingertips

i met a fool today that said love had made him that way
I told him that love is a dangerous thing it can make you laugh it can make you sing

a moment with you is worth a million in pain

reflections - all i see for these carfree years left behind
now I canÕt let go of this old life but I know its time I let go(Im letting go now)
but I donÕt know if I can
If I can be free of this prison
and free of this life
I built for myself
saying IÕm not where IÕm meant to be

I shoud be somewhere else somewhere someone would love me
thats my dream to become somthing more than i ever was before
someone to be proud of someone IÕd be proud to be

but I could never be that one that I adore
and if I could who would I be
I just wish I was someone other than me
but I know I could be so much more
what have I done all these years I have to right all thes wrongs
and try and catch up with the world passed by
as I watched and waited and wanted to join

but now I see what I did wrong
I never gave enough of myself
I just got buy excusing my lack of knowledge with a lack of caring
now it haunts me as the world greets me with open arms welcoming me into their own personalized hell
but I want to be more

I remember being hurt all my life
hating myself longing for everyone to hold me up in esteem
desiring fame and popularity
for every one to know my name
so I waited to be great ato be loved
to be what i was meant to be

time passes friends come and grow
left behind unwanted uneeded and all alone
close off the world and dissapear into my self where anything is possible

feeling different
like the ugly duckling
silently wondering why he didn't fit in
hurting and crying at night
longing to be excepted and loved

hiding from the world wishing for a different place
finding no comfort but looking for none
this must be depression
hurting inside but peacful on the surface
no nothing seems wrong
content and looking for fun
none but those who knew had a clue

i look at all the things I do wrong
the debt of the father is now my own for my own selfish ways
its funny the way we change
rigCht before we leave a place

to see and understand the me I am now you have to see the me that I was
I couldnÕt go back to that though I see myself sliding futher and further down
slowly killing myself and my purpose
where am I going

we pic our own soundtrack
never tell what should be shown never show what shoud be said

writing the book of the voices in his head
in the end the cast remains the same


fighting against intangible words
struggling to make sure thos words mean nothing at all
like a mission statement saying I will do somthing though I do not know what
what can you give that no one else can but yourself in your art




its a little known fact that obnoxious people are more fun in chance circumstances
exact recall is the hardest part
think in sequenses
build it do it this is what you need
schedule everything

don't make a sound you know what I found
and no I donÕt want you back cause you're fuckin around
and your not worth these tears or wasted years

a flock of words filled the sky of my mind
an outstretched hand captures only a sample
a few insignificant scraps such a struggle to make sense of this